Oscar and Kirrily Aguilera: ‘where there was one, now there is two’
|Kirrily and Oscar Aguilera with their young family (from left): Ben, Zac and Tom.|
By Virginia Knight, Catholic Outlook, April 2012
Oscar and Kirrily Aguilera have been married for 5½ years. They met at a youth gathering hosted by Most Rev Kevin Manning DD as part of a diocesan Pastoral Youth and Young Adults Program. They stayed on for pizza, exchanged email addresses and started going out.
And while ultimately they discovered they shared similar values and common goals in life, Kirrily said it was a providential meeting and connection, as Oscar was not the sort of person to whom she is normally drawn; describing herself as an extrovert, while he is shy and quiet. “It is like God brought us together,” Kirrily said.
Both had spent time discerning a vocation to religious life. “Then we opened ourselves up to the idea of the vocation of marriage through prayer and discernment,” Kirrily said.
They both agree that they fit together and complement each other. “We share a similar set of Christian values towards religion, life and family,” she said.
Kirrily has lived and worked all her life in the Parramatta area, attending St Patrick’s Primary and Our Lady of Mercy College. Oscar was born in Mexico and migrated to Australia with his family when he was 11, settling in Castle Hill and attending Gilroy College.
What underlies the union of these two very different people from very different backgrounds is the strong sense of family and commitment to working together.
No decision is made on a solo basis, quite simply they believe in and live according to the maxim, ‘where there was one, now there is two’.
Kirrily and Oscar have three boys: Zachary nine months, Thomas aged two and Ben aged four, who will start school at St Patrick’s next year. The couple proactively model their Catholic values and practices at home, believing parents are the first educators and as vital in the development of character and the total child as teachers will be in their academic education.
“Their cultural identity is Catholic,” Kirrily said. “We say grace and pray together at home and regularly talk about Jesus. They look at life through God as a loving father who has created the world and given it to His children to live in.”
Still active in parish ministry as readers and special ministers of the Eucharist, more recently the couple has taken on a new role with CatholicCare Sydney as educators in the Natural Fertility Program.
Kirrily regularly addresses young couples preparing for marriage about practising natural fertility, explaining how to use the methods effectively and detailing how they have used it in their own marriage.
“It is an efficient method within the teachings of the Church,” Kirrily said. “And it is a spiritual commitment which respects each person as to who they are and how they are made. We are called as a couple to consider regularly whether we want more children.”
The biggest challenge is managing time; juggling careers with raising their young family. They are fortunate to have had a lot of support from their extended family and work together to maintain a balance between family, children, themselves as a couple, and personal space.
While their current employment offers them both flexible hours and the chance to work from home part of the time, they have developed a rhythm to their lives with strictly enforced parameters to ensure they do things together.
“The weekend is family time,” Oscar said. “We go to Mass as a family and then visit our extended family. The time we spend is also time with God through prayer.”
They give each other time to devote to their own interests: Kirrily haunts libraries to indulge her passion for reading while Oscar develops new computer programs.
“We have our ups and downs as in any marriage, but we have a commitment to each other,” Kirrily said. “We took vows and promised to be a team for the rest of our lives, so we will make it work.”
“We solve everything before we go to bed, we don’t hold grudges,” Oscar adds. “We take every day as a special day and make the most of it.”“We are not just two individuals in a marriage, we are united as a team,” Kirrily continues. “Our first initials are O and K, so we are team OK!”
Couples in their first 20 years of marriage, together with their families and guests, attended the inaugural Catholic Diocese of Parramatta Mass for Celebrating the Early Years of Marriage on Sunday 22 April. The Bishop of Parramatta, Most Rev Anthony Fisher OP, presided at the Mass in St Patrick’s Cathedral.
Download Bishop Anthony's Homily for the 3rd Sunday of Easter, with Blessing of Newly Married Couples
Listen to this Homily at Bishop Anthony's iTunes Podcasts
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